Relationships (Type Combinations) — The Enneagram Institute
The Enneagram is a system of nine personality types, showing the interactions among each type. fields, yet frequently at the expense of their personal relationships and emotions. Type 5 leaders often appear detached from the team, however, White, Black, Red, Green, Blue, Yellow, Magenta, Cyan. What Each Type Brings to the Relationship. An Enneagram Five/Nine pair gives each other a great deal of personal and emotional space for activities and for. Keep in mind that one can have a relationship with any type if the two people are healthy. Since this is not always the Type 3 - The Achiever. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9.
Ironically, Sally thought she had just met her hero.
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She gave up most of her business and became a part-time housewife while doing her business part time since she could not bring herself to completely stop working. Within a few months, Fred was raging at Sally calling her lazy and childish. He did not need to be taken care of by a housewife.
He wanted her to take care of him by making money. Fred claimed he would never marry her till she did! Fred acknowledged his personality structure.
Enneagram of Personality
Sally rebuilt her business. They prefer to occupy their minds with ideas about how to make lots of money without being slaves to the establishment. They imagine they can have freedom to stop working whenever they want and play through life. George, an Enneagram 7, married Sue, an Enneagram 5. George and Sue agreed that they would like to share their life together traveling and having adventures.
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George decided to make money as a day trader on the stock market so that he could work only when and as many hours as he desired. Sue agreed not to work.Enneagram Shorts Type 5 What to Expect in Relationship
George found himself working in front of the computer every day…all day… and doing research in the evenings. Potential Trouble Spots or Issues Tensions between Fives and Nines can begin to grow as a result of the very amount of space that each is willing and able to give the other.
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Both are highly aware of boundaries and of feeling pressured or intruded on by anyone, and so both tend to expect an unusual degree of independence from the other and to give a large degree of freedom to the other without being asked. For this reason, it is often difficult for Fives and Nines to take the initiative to make a date, for instance or to be decisive about calling on a regular basis, or even to know what their feelings are telling them about the other. There may well be a great deal of comfort and intellectual rapport, but one or both of the couple may be relatively cut off from their feelings so that they do not actually know how much they care for the other, or even if they are in love.
Nines tend to be more emotionally available and fluid in this regard, liking and even idealizing the Five while they are together, but quickly forgetting those positive feelings when the person is away. Nines easily get into an out of sight, out of mind state where the other might as well not exist if they are not physically together.
Nines can also idealize the other so much that when they get together, the Five cannot really live up to the image that the Nine has of them in their imagination.
Fives, on the other hand, can become frustrated by the on again, off again attentions of the Nine and begin to become cynical and pessimistic about the relationship, analyzing the Nine and intellectually dissecting the relationship both as a defense from being hurt and as a way to express anger over their disappointment.
Both types can be disconnected from themselves and from the other, living in projections and imagination rather than seeing the other as they are. Work and solitary interests can take the Five's attention, and the pursuit of peace and more supportive relationships can draw the Nine away. Unless there is an intense reason to see each other frequently, the stubbornness, inertia, and autonomy issues of the Nine will mix with the withdrawal, detachment, and indifference of the Five and the relationship will wither away.