Relationships problems and pregnancy | Tommy’s
Expert relationship advice and in-depth guidance to help you figure out what's Particularly when you're pregnant, you need your partner (or someone He may think he should know, and worries about being 'found out'. From the moment you found out that you were pregnant, you likely began Anything baby-related should be scheduled in your calendar like a doctor. I have been in an on/off relationship with my current 'partner' for five years now. Ask Ammanda: I want to leave my relationship but I can't because I'm pregnant.
Sign up for our newsletter for daily pregnancy tips. You will get clingy The pregnancy hormones surging through your body can have a profound impact on your emotions, triggering your feelings of panic. Don't worry -- this crazy woman will recede back into her primal cave as your pregnancy progresses.
In the mean time, it's a good idea to warn your partner. Let him know you're feeling especially needy right now, and that it would really help for him to give you extra hugs and attention. You might not be on the same page The minute you see that extra line on the plastic stick, you feel like a mom. And your body gives you little signs to confirm your newly appointed status.
Your partner doesn't have any of those physical symptoms -- and until science catches up with science fiction, he never will. Which means he may not feel like he's a father until he holds that bundle of joy for the first time. Try not to feel upset if he doesn't seem concerned about picking out nursery paint or looking at booties. He might feel left out Again, everything is happening to you. Aside from a couple of congratulatory back slaps or a handful or cigars tossed his way, most of the excitement about the pregnancy revolves around you.
And since he can't exactly help you grow that thing, he might not feel so connected to it -- or to you, at times.
Encouraging him to bond with the bump will help him feel more integral to the pregnancy. All of the above complicate the situation, so just keep this in mind when you consider how best to repair and heal your relationship or marriage.
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You pay the same fee, regardless. Chances are you're both stressed out. So, I'm really hoping that this article will help the two of you calm down and look forward to the birth of the baby with less angst. I'm also going to assume that an abortion is not an option for you - and that is material for another article. If your partner has truly left you, then my breakup articles will be the best help for you right now. So, why might your partner be unhappy? Maybe you never really discussed it.
Or if you did, you may have thought he would change. Perhaps you thought he would be delighted the moment he knew you were pregnant. Maybe he felt you've left him with no choice. Why might he be behaving in such a 'selfish' way? He's fearful of the responsibility of having a child or another one. He's worried about finances: He's already self-conscious and is worried about being shown up in public as a failing dad.
He had a difficult childhood himself and doesn't want to risk putting his own children through a similar situation. He suffers from mental health problems and fears that he may pass that on to the child. He is fearful about passing on a genetic condition common in his family.
Your pregnancy and baby guide
He suffers from obsessive compulsive disorder and can't cope with the additional stress of having a child disrupt his routines and rituals. He fears having to compete with the child for your attention.
He may be worried that he knows zilch about pregnancy, if this is his first baby. He may think he should know, and worries about being 'found out'. He may be completely at a loss about his role as a dad if this is his first child, particularly if he has grown up without a father, The pregnancy is ill-timed in his mind for whatever reason: He may be miffed about a lack of sex and intimacy.
He may translate your preoccupation with the baby as you not loving him as much as you did before.
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Or he may remember from a previous pregnancy how you seemed in his mind to be in a world of your own with little attention for him. You may be over the moon, but he may feel a failure. Perhaps he had plans to end the relationship. Or maybe he is having an affair. He feels ill-prepared for taking on increased responsibility for your other children.
He may have experienced your previous pregnancies and births as difficult, based on what you went through - whether that was a traumatic birth, post-natal depression or any other kind of problem. He's having an affair. A combination of any of the above. Now that I've given you a start, you may have some thoughts of your own about what the problem is and why he's being so off with you. Once you can understand the root of the problem, you can both take steps to address it.
Stressed by your husband? I can so understand that you feel alone and frightened about the future and depressed about your relationship. It's natural that you're now worried that you're going to be all by yourself; that giving birth is going to be tinged with sadness. However, the more stressed and depressed you are, the worse your sleep pattern is going to be and the less resilient you'll be.
Add to that your fluctuating hormone levels and you have a recipe for non-stop arguing. Yes, you may think he's being unreasonable, but you need to take care not to be - however difficult or tempting that may be under the circumstances. I do really want you to read my pages on the signs of an abusive relationship though, because it's really important to me to know that you and your baby are safe.
I'm sure you're already aware how important it is that you look after yourself - not just with an eye on your physical well-being. It's just as important to care for your mental and emotional well-being too. Read on for my tips on how to deal with this problem What to do about it all?
It's always scary to realise your marriage is 'failing'. Of course the thought that your partner is rejecting it is horrible. So, what can you do? There may be an underlying, undisclosed problem - particularly if there appears to be absolutely no logical sense to his argument. Also, he may not see it as 'cool' to discuss his fears, particularly now that you're more in need.
Relationship problems during pregnancy? 20 Possible reasons. 15 Tips
However, you can only begin to address the problem when you know what it is. If you get the opportunity, discuss your thoughts on parenthood together Importantly, do this without any judgement, pointing the finger or criticising your partner in any way. This is has to be a 'safe' conversation, you're giving your partner space to adapt themselves to the new reality.
I know, you it's not what you have wanted! But, this is your new reality at the moment.